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Monday, March 13, 2017

A Day in the LIfe of ejnosillA: Now... If I Wear My Hijab... Would You Kindly Shut Up and Sit Down!

"As-salāmu ʿAlaykum,"  (Peace Be Upon You)

A Day in the LIfe of ejnosillA:

Now... If I Wear My Hijab... Would You Kindly Shut Up and Sit Down!

As a Muslim of 6 ½ months, I have found myself in numerous, but friendly conversations about my Islamic beliefs. However, on one particular day at work, I had a conversation with a particular person who can really get on that last nerve… you know what I mean? That one who is... just doing the MOSTEST... as the kids would say!

The kind that regardless of the subject at hand, they want to act as if they know more and give you unnecessary or unwanted advice. You know that type that always has a condescending opinion that is masked as sincere advice, but their opinions are riddled in judgmental double talk and well… you know… hecks… just going to put it out there… STUPIDITY! THE KNOW IT ALL TYPE!!!

You would think that if they are getting on EVERYBODY’S nerves, that they would realize it or stop ignoring the fact that the problem is not us, but you… and you need to go sit your azz down somewhere… Just Saying!

Before I begin, I want to go on record that I truly, really like this women and value some of her opinions, but she can get on your nerves sometimes because she is so opinionated and aggressive with them. She is pretty cool... just aggressively and assertively opinionated... and I told her... Let's begin...

In my opinion, we had a work friendly debate about me wearing a hijab and she really could not grasp my reasoning. Now, once again… I have only been Muslim for 6 ½ months, but a Black American female for 44 years and at this point in my life, I am not ready to wear it and I am easing my way into it or transitioning you could say.

As our conversation progressed, I was thinking… hold on a minute Ms. Thang… now aren’t you one of those Jehovah Witnesses? In the meantime, while looking at her with the side eye... you know the one... that KNOW THIS HELFA DIDN'T JUST GO THERE one... or the one... I am about to light her azz up in a minute if she don't take her crazy azz somewhere and go sit it down... You are really testing my patience today... Okay... where was I?... oh yeah... in the meantime things to say were rapidly starting to cross my mind. 

Such as, well…  since we are speaking about how we are supposed to dress… where is your skirt and why are those pants so tight? Hecks… why is your cleavage sticking out of that blouse of yours and don’t you drink and party almost every weekend? Above all… aren’t you female? Are you even supposed to be working?


As I refocused, I tried to explain the fact that I was not raised in an Islamic country and I was not raised Muslim it was going to take time for me to truly conform into Islamic culture in regards to clothing. 

I was raised Baptist not Muslim and just like any religion, you must transition into it. There is no time limit on this transition; it’s solely based on the individual and their relationship with their GOD. Plus, as an American Black women, we have our own flavor and I want to incorporate that into my Islamic style of dressing.

Well, this trying to double talk me fool… oops… person told me that once a Jehovah Witness is publicly baptized that their transitional period is over. Now I am thinking: okay… where is this girl headed with this conversation… I am not in the mood for her nonsense today… she stated that after the baptism they instantly... and I did clarify… that once they are baptized, they immediately begin to dress, behave and follow the laws of the Jehovah Witnesses. She proceeded to say that you can tell if a women is a Jehovah Witness by the way she dresses and I thought… Really… because here you stand and I can’t tell?!?

I was really standing there looking at her as if she had lost her mind because she doesn’t realize that she was the one who told me that she was a Jehovah Witness about four or five months after she started working at our job. So that “way a women dress” theory flew right out the window… right along with her unsolicited judgments! At this point, I had enough of this conversation and was ready to light her azz up! I can only deal with the foolishness for so long… it was time for me to gut punch her azz and move along to something more mentally stimulating… it was really like talking to one of my kids… let’s just blame it on the mother in me!

So in my motherly persona… you know the one you use when you are trying to educate a child about the ignorant… once again… let me real… the stupid things that are coming out of their mouth which don’t make sense without actually saying that their dumbazz needs to go sit down somewhere because they are sounding stupid at this point… I stated that with life, we are all transitioning into different stages of life; whether we want to or not. It is part of being human.

Well she was standing there anxiously ready to get her next point across, but as Kevin Hart famously stated, “SHE WASN’T READY” for the setup! Then I asked her that from the moment she was baptized until now, has she not grown within her religion because once again… life is about growth and maturing. She began to look confused and dumbfounded because I usually don’t challenge her.
Then I stated that where she is now in her faith, she had to transition into her current state of growth and her closeness with Jehovah… correct? She agreed than how the hecks could she not understand my transition within my faith?  

I politely emphasized to her that I was confused that she was judging me for not wearing a hijab… which by right I should be wearing and I admitted that… just not ready yet and may ALLAH continue to work with me… but she was judging me, a person who has only been a Muslim for 6 ½ months while she sits there as a Jehovah Witness for all of her life… I didn’t even mention the rededication to her faith as she sits not doing what is required of her and judging me. My life is a daily struggle to learn all of the Islamic commandments.

"Message" from ejnosillA

I am standing there wondering how could she sit in judgement of me... now at this point with an attitude... because I turned that judgmental mirror right around on her? Plus, she started it and should have done her homework before meddling with me!

Well to make a long story short, I explained to her that I really do enjoy our little debates because I truly love hearing others opinions on a topic even if we do not agree.

See, I am the type of person that if we do not agree on something, I will go home and reflect on it. This gives me the opportunity to see all sides of the situation and it allows me to see things from another perspective. If after this reflection, I feel that your views make more sense than mines, I am women enough to come and let you know. I love conversations that enlighten me and allow me to grow as a person.

However, she called herself baiting me because I secretly knew she has been patiently waiting to catch me to finish one of our last four or five debates… see when dealing with people like that, I tend to put some fat on their heads than quickly bust a move. After, I say what I need to say, I am pretty much done with the conversation and go on about my business... plus… I know it really annoys her when I do that, but it tickles me more!!!

Now, I guess you are wondering what the purpose of this blog post is… well let me enlighten you. First, Ladies please leave others alone about their religious beliefs and practices. Especially, if you are not truly practicing yours! We all want to believe and make others believe that we got our stuff together in all aspects of our lives, but do you truly? Secondly, please do your homework before you start or go meddling with people. If you are going to start something at least present a sensible point of view and know what you are talking about! Lastly, just leave people alone! If they don’t ask than don’t engage. Ladies, stop starting unnecessary drama! Live your life and let other live theirs… Just Saying!

Stay Blessed Queens!




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