Girlfriend... Don't Allow Ms. Sista Parasite to Poison Your Life... With Her Petty Jealousies!!!

"As-Salaam-Alaikum," "Peace be unto you"

Ms. Sista Parasite Chronicles

Girlfriend... Don't Allow Ms. Sista Parasite to Poison Your Life... With Her Petty Jealousies!!!

Hey Ladies… do you have a homegirl that you find yourself side eyeing because of random things she says or does… You know the kind of chick that you swear she seems to be happy when you’re miserable… or she seems to be your friend in your face… but behind your back you're hearing some-thangs? Well… Sista Girl… I hate to tell you this… it seems like you got yourself a... Ms. Sista Parasite!

A Ms. Sista parasite can come in many forms... she can be a frenemy… a person that pretends to be a friend in your face, but behind your back she is truly your enemy... OR... they can be an acquantince or somebody you just know... like a coworker... who just does not have your best interest at heart. Now it’s hard to spot this type of woman because she’s a parasite and does like all parasites do…

Let me break it down for you, Girlfriend… a parasite is an organism that latches on to a host… that would be you… and exploits if for its valuable resources in order to survive… 

Meaning… this Sista parasite is sucking you dry Girl… she’s using you for your time… platform or notoriety... or maybe... even your money… your emotions and anything else that is valuable to you… so she can get ahead… while bringing you down… She's just a hot... parasitic mess... that's what she is... and if you don't be careful... she breed and quickly multiply... like an infestation of roaches... if you do not detect this menacing, toxic entity in her early stages of latching on to you and your situation... Just Saying!

See... Ms. Sista parasite pretends to share that bond of mutual affection… or admiration because you to maybe running in the same circles... you know… like a close friend or sister…or a cool acquaintance in your face… pretending to really be digging you or respecting you, if you will...

She seems to be very attentive to your needs… like most friends or acquaintances are supposed to do… but behind your back… 

She's secretly has resentful, nasty and harboring some feelings of hate towards you… usually because she's insecure and jealous of you... AND above all... NOBODY LIKES HER AZZ... Just Saying... Just... Saying!?!

She seems to be a loner... a lonely, victimized, toxic creature who seems to go through friends like we would go through underwear... she seems to always have a new friend... one who is in need or vulnerable... some who is less fortunate then her... appearing as that certain someone's savior... confidant... mentor or even friend.... or should I dare to say... I dare to say it... do... I... dare... to... say... YEP... her Next Victim... Just Saying!

She will latch on to this unwitting victim and drain the life sustaining resources from this person... whether it be... financial, emotional, and/or physical... etc... 

She will boldly and unapologetically spread her toxic poison throughout your Sista circles... telling lies... doing devious things... and next thing you know... all your homegirls are mad at you... BUT... more importantly... 

A Ms. Sista parasite can be any woman you hold dear in your life. She could be your mother, grandmother, sister, niece or cousin... hecks... liked I said... she can be anyone that you hold dear... hecks... she can even be... YOU... JUST SAYING!

Anyways...

Girlfriend… having this type of woman around you is toxic and emotionally draining… and after she gets done making your life a living hell… it’s off to the next host… Just Saying!!!

Now… Ms. Sista parasite can be an elusive creature… she can be hard to detect because she preys on your kindness and good heart… but like always… I got you, Girl… and here go 4 sure signs to let you know if you have a Ms. Sista parasite attached to you... OR... to find out if YOU are the toxic parasite in your Sista Circles… Let’s begin…

1) She Always Seems to Want What You Have

Now… Ladies… we all know as women we tend to have our own style about ourselves… even if you and your girl bought the exact same outfit… it will still look like two different outfits because you both have your own stylish flava. 

Meaning, you two could have the same shirt and pants… right… but when you get done adding your flare to the outfit and she does the same… they look like two different outfits… but not with Ms. Sista parasite…

 

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Remember… she was with you when you bought your outfit from Forever 21… admiring it… telling you how smashing you’re going to look at the club on Saturday in it… and you are eating all these compliments up… as you should be… but when you meet up at your favorite spot on that Thursday for Happy Hour… she’s wearing your outfit… and wearing it well…

See, Ladies… there’s a thin line between admiring and being jealous… most women who admire your outfits are inspired by your stylish flava… but not ole Ms. Sista parasite… See… what she did was… she took herself right on down to Forever 21… bought your outfit… with your accessories and made sure she wore it to your favorite club so everyone will think it’s hers when you eventually sport your identical outfit…

Too make it so dang bad… she even is wearing the little shoes you were planning on buying on Friday when you got paid… and now... 

You’re sitting there at Happy Hour looking unhappy and stunned… like somebody slapped you… but you play it off and tell her she's looking good tonight while thinking... in my dang outfit!!

I betcha this isn’t the first time she has done this to you… but you keep right on ignoring Ms. Sista parasite… instead of confronting her and letting her know that it’s annoying you… and it’s really weird… 

Kinda like… Single White Female… weird… so you need to figure out if you are going to continue to put up with this behavior from… Ms. Sista parasite… or maybe it’s time to keep it moving… Just Saying!

2) She's Competitive, Always Trying to Upstage You and Revels in Your Demise

Now… Ladies… in my opinion… a little friendly competition between friends can be healthy, but too much can be… well… too dang much! Have you ever been in a competition with someone and didn’t know it? 

To me… there’s nothing sadder than when a Ms. Sista parasite is in competition with another woman and that other women doesn’t even realize that they’re in a competition… or when Ms. Sista parasite is trying to one-up you!

See… when a Ms. Sista parasite is secretly in a competition with you or is trying to one-up you… everything that you do… will plan to do or has done it bigger… and better than you! Remember… those designer shoes you bought and showed her… well it turns out that she has five pairs compared to your one… 

Or… remember that raise you got… you were so happy and proud of yourself... well Ms. Sista parasite got one and hers was three times bigger than yours… let her tell it… remember… your birthday party your “Real” homegirls threw for your 21^st birthday… well she had one too… but Ms. Sista parasite’s was a birthday extravaganza… you see where I am going with this?!?

See women like our Ms. Sista Parasite will always manage to try to upstage your accomplishments… no matter how big or small… whatever it is… hers will always be grander… well… that’s what she wants you to believe… BUT... and I am stressing this BUT... what she really likes is to see you fail!

Yezzz... Ladies... this woman loves them... lives for... and revels in your failures! That's why she is always available during your vulnerable times... your times of hardship or troubles. She is happy to see you fail because that makes her feel as you are getting what you deserve because you maybe too high strung... in her eyes... and you needed to be brought down a peg or two...OR...

It could be because you have unwittingly did something to her and she has not forgiven you for it. So, in her her parasitic mind, YOU DID THAT ON PURPOSE... so, she waits... and sits in the cut... just for her moment for you to fail so she can get her parasitic pick-me-up... but in all actuality, you did not know anything was wrong... 

So, you unwittingly have given her the ammunition she needs to justify that parasitic feeling she has that she is and will always be... better than you... and... as I mentioned earlier, she will go behind your back... or in public... depending on her version of this toxic parasite because some are bold and hard to get rid of... and she will announce your failures to the other Ms. Sista Parasites in her... or your parasitic Sista Circles.

While you are thinking this woman is really in your corner, she is really reveling in your demise she is spreading her toxicities to whoever will listen to turn them against you as well. You can try to keep hanging in there… but what’s the point… what are you gaining from this toxic relationship… Just Saying!

3) She’s So Needy

Now… another characteristic of Ms. Sista parasite is she’s so needy… just like any other parasitic organism… she is so bothered when you venture out on your own… or even hang out with other Sistas in your circle… because she feeds off her host… meaning… you… for what you have… and what you hold dear.

A needy Ms. Sista parasite doesn’t want you to be around your other friends because she feels as if she is going to miss out on something… and she needs to be the center of attention at all times… and more importantly… she’s scared that you might find out about how bad she’s been hating on you… Moving on…

So, Ladies… you can pinpoint a needy Ms. Sista parasite because she’s the one that always wants to go wherever you are going… she’s got to be up under you 24/7 and gets an attitude when she finds out that you were hanging out with your other girls… 

She’ll start hating on them and throwing some soft shade your way as well… she might even try to get your girls together without you… as a way of getting back at you… saying stuff like… oh… I forgot you didn’t have to work… knowing good dang well that you’ve had the same work schedule for years…

Or… I thought you were too tired to go out, so I didn’t want to bother you… shady stuff like that… see… Ms. Sista parasite is showing the signs that she is desperate for friends…um… probably wants your friends… and envious of your other friendships… and might be hellbent on getting you put out of your Sista circles… so she can fill your spot… 

So… if you find that you have lived one of these little scenarios… or one like it… Girlfriend… you have a Ms. Sista parasite attached to you… and if you don’t start addressing her behaviors… she’s going to try to become the MVP of your Sista circle… so you better watch out... Just Saying!

4) She’s Always Negative and Discouraging

Well… you know how you tell friends, acquaintances... or just plan ole women you interact with that you’ve finally found the love of your life and you think this person is the one… and all your other friends are so excited and congratulating you… but not ole Ms. Sista parasite! 

She will walk up to you and say something like… “Oh… are you talking about old boy that works down the way… yeah… my cousin used to date him when he was on drugs will bad… but I guess he must have cleaned himself up… Congrats anyway girl.”

See… our frenemy… Ms. Sista parasite is jealous... she’s mastered the art of camouflaging shade as friendly compliments… and when you’re telling her about your good news or accomplishments… you are always met with some hint of negativity… 

Her jealous azz is always trying to find a way to disrupt your good mood by throwing some salt your way… in an effort… and in her warped mind… she’s trying to even the playing field by making you feel bad while making herself feel better… 

Friends like... Ms. Sista parasite... really don't care about you or your well being... it's all about them and their needs. 

Think about it... has she every really been there for you when  you really needed her... and that one time that she did come to your aid... 

You wished she wouldn't have because after she left... you felt more miserable and depressed like never before... and she seems to thrive in your misery...

Or... she takes this opportunity to make it all about her... once again... while you're sitting over there feeling sad and alone... but remaining a true friend to Ms. Sista parasite... so you start trying to help her figure things out... like... are we still recognizing the rule that you can't wear white after Labor Day... you know... important things like that.

In the meantime... your needs are once again are pushed aside to appease Ms. Sista parasite... When are you going to acknowledge... that real... I mean real down and true homegirls... feel your pain... not add unto it... Just Saying!?!

ejnosillA’s Final Thoughts

Ms. Sista parasites are common within our Sista circles… hecks… there is one in each circle of women… and who knows… you might be one of them?!? However, as women… we have big hearts and we love hard… but we never seem to know when to pull the plug on a relationship… especially the ones we hold near and dear to our hearts… so it is easy for us to let a Ms. Sista parasite to get attached to us… and us to them.

Ladies… you must understand that a typical Ms. Sista parasite is not a true supportive friend. A true friend would want to see you succeed and be happy… they would push you to happiness… hecks even try to carry you to it… if need be… 

On the other hand... ole Ms. Sista parasite… would rather put roadblocks in your way and secretly laugh at you when hurdling them becomes too much for you to handle… or they will try to plant negative seeds into your mind that would have you acting a dang fool… or doubting yourself and your capabilities…

Remember… a Ms. Sista parasite is the type of woman that would push you down… run over you and try to make you feel bad because you lost the race… so you must ask yourself… 

“Why do I continue to keep this parasitic and toxic woman in my life?” To be friends with a Ms. Sista parasite is draining and unproductive and you deserve to have real, supportive and inspiring women that are empowering entities in your life… in your circle… So... Girlfriend... don't allow Ms. Sista parasite to poison your life... with her petty jealousies... Just Saying!?! As usual…

Stay Blessed Queens!
~ejnosillA

Question of the Day

Why Do You Keep Hanging On to Your 
Ms. Sista Parasite?

May ALLAH continue to bless me with an empowering Sista Circle

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***This post was updated by ejnosillA on August 5, 2018***

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